Here we go again

12 Sep

Do you ever get a song stuck in your head? Help me out here, do you know the song… “here we go again… ” Who sang it? It had a great back-beat. It must have been 1989-ish… was it salt ‘n peppa? Anyway, it’s stuck in my head and I think this post would read much better if you sing it in your head while you read…

 I’m proud to call Karen Heller (not to be confused with Hellen Keller) my friend. She does not look like a yogi, she looks like an Eileen Fisher Model. You know the type. The tall, gorgeous woman-next-door-except-better type. If you don’t pay close attention, her calm demeanor will fool you. Truth is, whenever she opens her mouth out spills something profound and relevant. I’ve learned to pay attention when she’s talking.

Months after one of her yoga classes, I’m still pondering something she said…”they say 90% of our thoughts are repetition”. So true. I go over and over the same old stories,  justifications, and emotions. If I don’t pay attention it is an endless circle. Here we go again… come on… sing it with me!

Years ago I didn’t know that my mind and my spirit were separate. I didn’t know that the mind is there to be the servant, not the master. No wonder I had dealt with depression, I was a prisoner of my thoughts. I thought I was my thoughts. Then one day I was driving a car load of kids on a field trip in Oakland and we got lost and separated from the caravan. Talk about anxiety! Just when I was about to lose it, I saw a bumper sticker that changed my life. It said, “Don’t believe everything you think.” It was like a flashing billboard placed smack in front of me from God herself.

And that was the beginning of my meditation practice. Paying really close attention to the endless movie reel being played in my head. Learning to switch gears mentally. Finding some peace from my own internal voice!

Have you tried that meditation thing yet?  I hear my students say, “I just can’t go there yet” or “I’m not ready for it” and I think about how much courage it takes to just try. To just try and sit with yourself and be quiet. It’s way more courageous than doing a handstand or a drop-back. My favorite excuse though is, “I don’t have time.” Granted, we’re busy doing asana, but using that excuse is like being given a ticket to eternal paradise and choosing to go to hell instead!

Two minutes is all it takes sometimes to shift out of the fictional anxiety that plays out in the mind and into the bliss of the present moment. Sometimes I need to just stop and question my own thoughts. “Oh really Laurie? Ya think?”

Here we go again….

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One Response to “Here we go again”

  1. Julie September 12, 2007 at 10:36 pm #

    I once read an interview with Stephen King where he was asked how he choses his book topics. His response was that he thinks of his mind as a sink with thoughts like water constantly pouring through and that his book ideas were the stuff that gets stuck in the drain on the way out. I have often thought of this very fitting analogy and wonder if it is possible to flush the negative thoughts, anxiety and excuses and not allow them to get trapped in my drain. Perhaps meditation can be a sort of psychic plunger, flushing the bad to keep it all from backing up. Perhaps it is time to give it a try.

    Oh yeah…my first time on your blog and all your profound words and thoughts have been overrun by the song now stuck in my head! I’m pretty sure the one your thinking of is by a band named Portrait, random trivia also gets stuck in my drain. Peace!

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