popularity

25 Apr

I never was one of the popular girls in high school. Or college. I wore too much black for that and never quite mastered that lilting giggle that swerves conversation to a lighter place. I always shared my opinion – even if it went against the grain. 

In my home though, I’ve been tickled to be the “it” girl. Being mom makes me the most wanted person in the social world of the Gallagher clique.  Everybody wants my time and attention. Most of my jokes get a good laugh, and my previously unappreciated talent of belching has won great favor amongst my kids. I get tons of hugs, I’m invited to every party and everybody follows me around and copies me. I’ve finally arrived! (as I type I’m hearing, “mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, MOM”)

(pause)

Although this morning I was dissed – big time. My 3-year old wouldn’t eat her breakfast, my 8-year old was throwing shoes and sulking because he had no clean socks, and my 12-year old is mad because he can’t surf the web. He just left for school and when I said,  “I love you!” He said, “I know.” 

Ouch.

Parenting is like tapas. It’s a refiners fire that’s intense and omni-present. It’s easy to stay in the moment and love family life when I’m Miss Popularity, but on mornings like this I’m trying to just hang in there. I’ve already yelled twice this morning and my mind is telling me I need to escape! This is it – parenting as the ultimate guru. I’m trying to remember that this is just the way things should be – if I’m Miss Popularity all of the time, then I’m probably doing something wrong. And this feeling of wanting to escape my role as Mom is actually my way in. Like a little bell ringing – reminding me to pull up a piece of rug and take a seat. 

Time for a meditation practice today….

 

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